May 2012
17 posts
9 tags
May 29th 2012-- Disneyland, CA
Americans are fat, loud, and happy! My experience in Disneyland coming soon!
May 31st
1 note
6 tags
January 8th 2012-- Princess Cruise Ship somewhere...
” I was whacking the donkeys with painted ladies!They loved it!” Channel surfing in the middle of the ocean. Say no more because that right there says it all about TV, doesn’t it? …but seriously, wtf?
May 28th
6 tags
October 8th 2011-- Portland, OR Stumptown coffee...
I don’t really like greyhounds. They have no sense of humor.I always expect to see them profoundly sitting on a velvet bed by a fireplace as their master (not owner) sits and reads the Wallstreet Journal, smokes a cigar, and sips on a thing of brandy on the rocks. The dog in the meanwhile has his paws crossed and he quietly contemplates his old racing days, adjusting his posture out of habit...
May 28th
7 tags
March 21st 2012-- Vila Real, Portugal
You can always spot an old English woman. Its the way they carry themselves. The pasty and powdered skin contrasted with their rosy cheeks, which are always, without exception, that heavy drunk pink. The English ladies always seem to be stout and find the most absurd over-sized floral printed outfits. The embellished shoes are both dull and gaudy at the same time and usually painfully match the...
May 28th
7 tags
August 16th 2011-- Lafayette, CA downtown...
Why is it that we find underwear lines through pants so offensive? I mean, sure, through the pants we are able to see the booty fit of their underwear (full coverage, boyshort, hipster, bikini, etc). And underwear! Heaven forbid we should even be reminded it is there. The slightest hint of its appearance causes us to judge the most normal of people, we think “don’t they care?! Have...
May 28th
6 tags
August 8th 2011-- Denver Airport
There’s a man probably in his late 30’s/ early 40’s who is attempting the chin-strap facial hair to make his face look more ‘chizzled’. This is a sorry attempt for he has one of those frog neck/chin things going on— almost a double chin, so the chizzling effect is around his first chin, I think he should grow a second strap around his second chin, that would be...
May 28th
5 tags
August 5th 2011-- Sheridon, WY
“I think we lost grandma again” said a young boy, one child of eight if I counted right. oh and also, again??
May 28th
5 tags
August 5th 2011-- Sheridon, WY
A truck just drove past, an old Ford pickup with chipped green paint. Behind the cab on a big pole sits a large Barbie doll head whose face is stained with exhaust and whose (purple) hair is ratted beyond repair. Not sure what to think about this one.
May 28th
4 tags
August 5th 2011-- Sheridon, WY
In the parking lot of Wal-Mart on a filthy Yukon SUV.
May 28th
6 tags
August 1st 2011-- Jackson Hole Airport
Every single man is wearing a cowboy hat. Even my grandpa, oh grandpa
May 27th
4 tags
August 1st 2011-- Denver Airport
This is more of a people-interaction more than an observation— but while dining at Domino’s Pizza I was approached by a guy. He seemed to be a few years older but had a friendly countenance. He held out his phone where he had typed out “whyr are you flying to?” He showed it to me, and before I could say anything more than “oh” he said okay and scurried back to...
May 27th
4 tags
July 31st 2011-- Lafayette, CA downtown Starbucks
An older balding man has an intense mustache and the song “Rockstar” by Nickelback as his ringtone. Really? I’m sure you are tired of standing in lines for clubs you’ll never get in.
May 27th
4 tags
July 25th 2011-- Lafayette, CA Starbucks on the...
A man wearing a scrubs shirt and blue jeans pulled into the parking lot, found no parking and then decided to pull into the handicap spot. I thought maybe he had a temporary card until he stepped out of his little Honda Accord, slammed the door, and power walked in the Starbucks for his cup of Joe. Tsktsk, the doctors of today. I guess if some amputee war veteran falls down from parking so far...
May 27th
4 tags
July 25th 2011-- Lafayette, CA Starbucks on the...
Mercedes S550, license plate <3BJERKE. What on earth could that possible mean? If its your boyfriend, he’s not worth it. I like her purse though.
May 27th
4 tags
July 25th 2011-- Lafayette, CA Starbucks on the...
“Awesome ends with me” is the phrase written on a young boy’s shirt. He’s bouncing off the benches and clearly things that he completes the word awesome— and maybe he does, but that’s not what the shirt implies. Let’s be annoyingly critical about this: really is shirt implies that everything is awesome until he shows up and then all of the awesomeness...
May 27th
8 tags
July 18th 2011-- Lafayette, CA downtown Starbucks
Outside of the Starbucks there are two kids— probably middle school age. The girl has a basket attached to the front of her bike with that I would have to assume is the most petrified cat in the world. There’s a lid on the top of the basket to ensure the poor creature has no hope of escape. Though, I really cannot criticize too much. I know that if I had had the opportunity as a child,...
May 27th
6 tags
July 18th 2011-- Lafayette, CA downtown Starbucks
In the parking lot I drove past an older man and a respectively older woman who are bickering. I can only tell because of the man’s arm gestures. I park my car near them in the next aisle over and keep my windows down. Mostly incoherent, but occasionally the man raises his voice enough to let me catch a glimpse. “you’re not letting me finish!” I wonder if he is the...
May 27th